For The Days The Treadmill Just Won’t Cut It

by Daniella Lee

Working out can be a task, even if in the back of your mind you know its good for you. Our research find this week focused on the importance of exercise and how it increases brain activity, even for us old farts. Some-days running is as appetizing as liver and eggs, my grandpa’s favorite. So today we offer an alternative to running, an alternative to actually working out. These weird work-out machines might not get you the same results as actual cardio but man, are they ridiculous!

The Shake Weight

We’ve seen the infomerical a dozen times during those late night Lifetime movie-thons, but what the hell is this thing. The Shake Weight claims to tone and shape your arms, shoulders and chest in just 6 minutes a day! Doubt it. This device allegedly use new work-out technology called Dynamic Inertia, which after some research, no one really knows what it mean.. Anything that claims incredible results without having you move your ass probably doesn’t work, but that’s up to your discretion. What’s worse than The Shake Weight… The Shake Weight for Men.

The Stud Master

Hugh Hefner may use Viagra to keep his three girlfriends happy, but Joe Shmoe might not be able to afford the miracle drug, none the less three girlfriends. So what’s the answer? The Stud Master! Designed by Dr. Weener, seriously this guy’s last name is Weener, The Stud Master… well what the hell do you think it does? Just and f.y.i. guys, it is a one-size-fits-all machine, so you don’t have to measure before you go out and grab it.

Mechanical Horse

Ride um cowboy! This mechanical horse is similar to riding your personal Italian Stallion. We’re not really sure how it works, since it is all in Japanese, but I’m sure it’ll hit big once it comes to the States. The lady in the picture looks like she is getting a work-out and like they say, don’t knock it till you try it.

The Hobart I-Cool Chair

Technology is making it easier to literally sit on your ass and burn fat. Impossible if you know the first thing about working out, but that won’t stop these nerds. We’re not really sure how they claim to do it, so I’m letting the geniuses explain it. “I-Cool, the first ever Exercise-Free, Calorie Burning seat designed to deliver significantly increased sedentary calorie burn rates. This proprietary system, which induces accelerated calorie outtake via temperature regulation, creates a revolutionary personalized micro-environment, by allowing individual users to set their preferred temperature within the comfort of their own personal space, regardless of the climate around them.” [From link above].

Whatever you chose, treadmill, elliptical, or the stud master, working out is a necessity to live a healthy, long life. We all know that the strange machines that are shown late at night are probably a hoax but they provide a good laugh.. and maybe more (the stud master).


One response to “For The Days The Treadmill Just Won’t Cut It

  1. Can you use the StudMaster while sitting in the I-Cool?

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